Monday, July 12, 2004

NSF. Why anger management for regulars involves us.

Today I had a great day. I woke up. As I felt kinda down from the drudgery and monotony of work and peonism, I went to make some coffee.

Mmy OC had left for overseas deployment, I was tasked as peon to the great one to fill in for him in my capacity in addition to the tonnes of work already stacked up from regulars who find job fulfilment in unnecessary clarifications.

Email from a Regular: Hey man, that aircon of yours will be fixed in like 2 days time k?

Email from Me: Got that, will inform my OC once he gets back.

Regular: So is your aircon broken or something?

Me: If broken is not blowing out any air... yes. Wasn't this submitted in the work request reports?

Regular: It was, but I dont trust the courier service, I believe they doctor documents to their own evil ends. They also always try to appear pitiful to put you off.

Me: Thats because they are generally too sick to even make it to BMT. So is that all the clarification you need?

Regular: Not really, I have all this free time till I take my canteen break. I believe I need to tell intelligence about these sick people. I think they are not sick. They are just trying to look sick.

Me: Sorry Sir, I gotta go back to doing some work. Thanks for helping us fix the aircon.

Regular: Dont worry about it, maybe you can help by following these sick people. I do it all the time. Or at least in between taking MC on Monday and going for Off on Tuesday

Regular: Hey! you havent responded to my last email! Dont make me come after you!

Regular: Haha... I have used all my free time to wrap your air con repair request in red tape! Now both of us dont win! Mwahahaha!

This is generally the kind of absolute crap (albeit slightly embellished undertones) which happens in the logistics department of the army. I have a working theory that the armed forces is the state welfare equivalent of other countries. The only forseeable difference is that such morons tend to hinder actual productive work and they get paid more. Which is kinda worse but nobody can be seen to be getting a free lunch.
So I work way into my lunch hour (which tends to be 1100 hrs for regulars and 1245 hrs for me) and when I finally emerge with an empty mug of coffee and a throbbing migraine, I get screwed cause I was supposed to give a lecture as ordered by a warrant officer. Of course, no one bothers to check if I happened to be following orders from a captain. I get confused naturally and daydream a little about what that old fart would look like without a head.
After a proper military dressing down, (involving extensive use of hokkien vulgarities and its applications to my questionable parentage) I was let off to return to work with no food and another cup of coffee. In fact, let me digress, I live on that damned sludge day in and out. Without coffee, I generally cannot function and wouldnt even want to. I was thinking of getting antidepressants as my Warrant officers tend to be more interested in what he thinks is right than what a general order from a Brigadier general thinks is right. That tends to create conflicts of interest in so many levels I tend towards the more trigger happy crowd. So my warrant officer gets no sugar from his lady last night and he had R hand and L hand as sex buddies and we get to pay for that?

Argh. Now all have to do is fail my driving test and I can start to talk to the trash can about a story about horsies and a wizard.

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