The Chicken keeps his end of the bargain (3 weeks late)

Ok, so i got off my lazy ass and updated the blog.. So readership has dropped to an all time low of 1.5 hits per day (Masturbating Monkey visits back everyday as he gets his freak on reading HTML source code).. So Singapore is hazy due to rich indon-chinese burning moneys because they just have too much of it.. So i shouldnt spend moneys on a Turbo-Charger... oh so many issues to deal with...

The Heavenly Drain Water Chicken didnt update much the past few months due to work overload, laziness and a combination of both. More so because of work these few weeks.. Isnt it amazing how a few accountering quizes a week can drive you to the brink of exhaustion? coupled with finance and B.Admin tests, these are the number two causes of college student deaths on campus. Number one is still the campus busses.

My Accountering professor is renowned for his questionable enguish and fetish for sadisticly hard tests. A fresh graduate from the Shanghai School of Sub-Standard Pronunciation, he enjoys setting CPA-level standard questions in tests, as he believes throwing babies to the sharks is the only way for them to learn how to swim, or so he was taught in the Shanghai School of Sub-Standard Pronunciation.

His antics have earned him a place on my "501 Wall of fame". Some people prefer to call it the dartboard.


OK, lets start from the top... many months ago... pictures!

Australia!

Various random cakes! Sugary fatty cakes are an aussie delicacy, ensuring their reign as the 4th fattest nation in the world. Although sinful as they may seem, consumption of these cakes does actually provide some form of short term enjoyment before it heads straight for your arteries. It can be compared to delaying an accountering project till the very last minute before starting on it.

Of course, if sugary cakes arent enough, you could always drive down to the Bega Cheese Factory to eat cheap(and probably expired) Bega cheese.

Few people actually make it this far, as the Bega cheese factory is located deep in the desert(along the coast), far beyond where any obese australian can ever hope to reach.

Dolphins!

As Australia's fun stuff mostly lies along the costal areas, there are bound to be dolphins swimming around wherever you go. Feeding sessions can be arranged for unsuspecting people to spend moneys to buy dolphin park food to feed dolphin park dolphins. Of course, a strict diet of Fatty cakes and Bega Cheese is enforced 24-7. What's good enough for the people is good enough for the dolphins...


Olympic Park!

Its a magical place which Australia built in order to host the olympics sometime back. But now, its reduced to a tourist attraction for asians to go measure their height. Featured in the photo is Mrs Chicken.(Height measurement pole not made to scale). She makes the best darn homemade japanese curry this side of the world.


Art Exhibit!

Of course, 3 weeks in australia is never enough, but during our packed schedule, we still managed a visit to some art gallery. As seen in the picture, virtually anything can be made into an art exhibit. This one's called "I've created a piece of art and it's been infected by SARS carrying asians!".


Move House!

Back in Singapore, we moved house for renovations, as our previous contractor made our house out of sand from West Coast Park, claiming sand is the "in" thing for all homeowners who spent a bundle on home insurance. But after the pastor in church told us about the story of the foolish man who build his house upon the sand, we were beginning to have second thoughts about our house.


Artistic Singapore!

I recently saw a piece of artwork drawn on the back of a bus seat while on the way to Johor. It shows one of our top officials talking into a mic, held by another of our top officials.. I cant really read the chinese words on the top, but im taking it to mean "Long live the king"... Heyy.. wait a minuteeee...


Apartment Housewarming!

I recently moved into a new apartment, and had a housewarming.. This is the non-drinkers section, where everybody gathers to talk about grades, books and buying books.

Drinkers

Unfortunately, pasing out and being totally defenseless around hordes of drunk people might leave one with embarrassing stuff all over. Andrew learnt the next day that waking up and going to church without washing up or looking at the mirror can be detrimental to his reputation

Me

Being the guy with the camera, this is probably the only picture I have with me in it. Well at least a small part of me. It is also the most artistic shot of the night.
See how everyone is standing at angles? My art sec school art teacher would be proud of me. Give me 46/100 for my art final exam will she.... pffftzzz... It wasnt my fault I didnt read the instructions properly...

Paintball!

What better way to relieve stress, than to hurt your friends in a friendly game of paintball. Camo uniforms work for about 10 minutes before you are given a fresh coat of fluorescent yellow, green and red. When a paintball hits you, you feel a slight sting on your skin, much like when a Korean guy uses all his strength to punch you after you mistake his Von Dutch cap for OshKosh B'Gosh's latest summer collection.


40 Asians in a White Castle store! Bet U've never seen that before!




Note to self: write shorter, but more frequent blog updates. Its easier on you.